he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
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