I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."�
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
We just shotgunned beers for America
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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