She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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