the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
