there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
