After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
