hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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