two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Randomize