She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
