question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
