In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
