if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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