note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
