the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
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