How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
