I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I did not marry a roomba.
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