Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
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