I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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