the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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