I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
