Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
