haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Do vagina's smell?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Randomize
