Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
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