overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I'm at about main and main street
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
