Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize