I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
