I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize
