Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
