i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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