IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
