I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
My pussy is not your playground.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
