office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
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