Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize
