"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
