haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
