I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
