Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
