For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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