so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
