is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize