quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
There are leaves in my underwear?
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