i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Randomize
