For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Drunk walkin through police station. America
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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