Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
