I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize
