Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Randomize
