Me. At least after what I've been through.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
