Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Randomize
