I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
