Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i was born a porn star she said
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize