I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
